TODAY IN NUMBERS
WORLD · SATIRE · DEFINITIONAL SHIFT

Dakar Opens Africa's First Olympic Games, Four Years Late and Exactly on Schedule

About 2,700 athletes aged 14 to 17 will compete in 153 medal events across 25 sports until 13 November. The Games were originally awarded for 2022.

Senegal has opened the Youth Olympic Games in Dakar, bringing an Olympic event to Africa for the first time, as the continent seeks a bigger role in international sporting competition.

About 2,700 athletes aged 14 to 17 will compete until 13 November in the capital, in the nearby city of Diamniadio and at the beach resort of Saly, Africanews reported with the Associated Press. There are 153 medal events across 25 sports.

President Bassirou Diomaye Faye was scheduled to declare the Games open at 6.30pm local time, 0830 GMT, at the stadium in Diamniadio, with the International Olympic Committee president, Kirsty Coventry, and several heads of state expected to attend.

Hundreds of dancers joined a spectacle celebrating Senegalese and African culture, in line with the Games motto "Africa welcomes, Dakar celebrates".

The mascot is Ayo, a young lion wearing a traditional Fulani hat. Its name means "joy" in Yoruba, a language spoken in Nigeria and neighbouring West African countries. The ambassadors for the Games include the French actor Omar Sy, who has Senegalese roots, and the Senegalese Italian social media star Khaby Lame.

Several sports are making their Youth Olympic debuts. They include Baseball5, a five-on-five version of baseball played without bats and gloves; Wushu, a Chinese martial art that can be choreography-based or a combat sport; and coastal rowing beach sprint, which combines a run on the beach with a head-to-head rowing race. Beach wrestling features for the first time as well, a nod to Senegalese wrestling, the national sport, which is also performed on sand.

The first refugee team at a Youth Olympics will field six athletes based in Kenya and Uganda, in track and field, judo and taekwondo.

The Youth Olympics are a smaller competition than the Summer Games. Singapore hosted the first summer edition in 2010. Dakar was initially due to host in 2022, but the coronavirus pandemic delayed the Games by four years.

It is that last fact this newspaper wishes to put on the record properly, because it has been handled with considerable skill. The Games were awarded for 2022. They are being held in 2026. They are called Dakar 2026.

A four-year delay is therefore nowhere to be found in the title, the branding or the results. The event is late by four years and punctual to the day, and the two statements are compatible because one of them refers to the plan and the other to the name.

Our analysts note that the method is consistent with the rest of the programme, which is built on removal. Take the bats and gloves out of baseball and you have Baseball5, a new sport with its own medals. Take the water out of the first part of a rowing race and you have coastal rowing beach sprint. Take 2022 out of Dakar 2022 and you have Dakar 2026, which has never been postponed.

The Department of Unnecessary Research congratulates Senegal, and has one suggestion for the closing ceremony. Nothing in the Olympic Charter appears to prevent a host city from simply being given the year in which it is ready.

DAKAR 2026 IN SPORTS AND EVENTSQUESTIONABLE ANALYTICS
1625 sports
100153 medal events
The 25 sports and 153 medal events on the Dakar 2026 programme, each shown as a percentage of the larger figure.
THE BORING FACT

Senegal has opened the Youth Olympic Games, bringing an Olympic event to Africa for the first time, with about 2,700 athletes aged 14 to 17 competing in 153 medal events across 25 sports until 13 November. Dakar was originally due to host in 2022 before the coronavirus pandemic delayed the Games by four years.

Source: Africanews
OUR PROFESSIONAL CONCLUSION

Because the Games carry the year they are actually held, the four-year delay has been removed from the record, in the same way that taking the bats and gloves out of baseball produces a new sport rather than an incomplete one.

REALITY CHECK · DEFINITIONAL SHIFT

Unfortunately, there's a small problem.

Renaming an event does not undo a postponement: the delay is documented in the award of the 2022 Games and in the athletes who aged out of the competition. Baseball5 is a codified discipline in its own right, not baseball with items missing.

THE BS DETECTOR

Where did reality end?

Tap the paragraph where this story stopped being true. Then see where everyone else bailed.

 

READER CREDULITY METER

Did you believe this story before the twist?

Be the first reader to answer.

YOU WRITE THE CONCLUSION

Think you can end this story better than our analysts?

One deadpan conclusion, 280 characters at most. Start from the facts above and take them one step too far. Our editor picks the best one each morning, and it runs in the next edition.

280 left
No real people's private lives, no tragedy, nothing that accuses anyone of anything. Our editor reads every entry and prints one; the rest are never published.